Thanks to a stranger of the giving kind

A woman I had never met, who's name I do not know, gave me an early holiday gift this evening. She demonstrated the spirit of generosity, sharing and selflessness that the holidays are supposed to be all about.

I don't want to be overly dramatic or make a bigger deal out of it than it deserves. We aren't talking about an organ donation here. But she game me something new to be thankful for and made me smile.

I went to the local Fred Meyer store to pick up a pie for tomorrow's family Thanksgiving feast. I was asked to bring a pumpkin pie, but I didn't know if one would be enough. I didn't want to take two of the same pies. You have to have a little variety and give people some options. Besides, I don't eat pumpkin pie. I'm not a big dessert eater ever and pies in general are not my favorite dessert. But on those occasions I do eat pie I mostly stick to apple pie and cheesecake. Cheesecake is my favorite, but when I think of Thanksgiving desert, I think of apple pie.

So when I walked in the grocery store this evening, I checked out the large display of pies at the front of the store. There were plenty of pumpkin pies and a few peach pies, and a bunch of other berry pies. But there was no sign of an apple pie.

While looking through the selection of baked goods, I noticed another woman who also seemed to be having trouble finding whatever it was she seeking. Pretty soon she walked away and I was left to examine the display more thoroughly. But soon I gave up and headed for the back of the store to the bakery section.

When I got there, I found another big display of pies, including pumpkin pie in two different sizes. So I grabbed a pumpkin pie and kept looking.

"Are you looking for apple?" a woman standing near the display asks. I recognized her as the woman I had seen a few minutes earlier at the other pie display.

"Kinda," I said. "I'm under orders to get pumpkin, but I like apple."

"There were only two left," she said. "Here, take this one. I already have one." And with that she places the pie she is holding back on the top of the display."

I tried to say no thank you, but she said she didn't need two and that I was welcome to it. "Take it," she said. She smiled and went on her way.

I smiled too. That simple act of sharing, that display of generosity, was a great way to start the holiday season. I have been looking forward to Thanksgiving because it will give me a chance to spend time with people I love. But now, thanks to a random act of kindness, I'm looking a little more forward to the holiday season in general. I had been worried about finances and not being able to buy as many or as expensive of gifts as I would like to buy for loved ones. But a stranger in a grocery story demonstrated what I already should have known --it's acts of caring and kindness that make this season special, not the price tag or label on a gift.

Ode to a dream job

Sometimes I wonder what I would do if I wasn't a journalist. I used to be fond of saying, "I can always pump gas," based on my experience working for my dad when I was a teen. One of my jobs was servicing the airplanes, pickups and other rigs around the place. That involved pumping a lot of gas.

For a decade I had to stop saying "I can always pump gas," because it didn't make since to anyone in California when I lived there. California had self-service gas stations. Everyone pumped gas in California.

Now, I suppose, I could use the line again as a born-again Oregonian. I don't think my creditors would support the career change though.

But I may have found it. I have a new dream job.

I want to be a copy writer for Del Taco tray liners.

Seriously.

On my way home from work I decided to stop off for dinner someplace where I could get a taste of California. I have been eating at home primarily lately, and frankly, my cooking skills leave something to be desired. I needed a change. There is one Del Taco restaurant in Salem and it reminds me of SoCal. For several years I lived just a few miles down the road from Yermo, Calif., the birthplace of the Mexican fast food chain. Although, as I recall, Barstow tries to claim for Del Taco's founding. If you've ever been to Barstow, you'd understand the people there need to be known for something beyond being a piss stop between L.A. and Las Vegas.

I was never a big fan of Barstow, but I loved the California deserts. The Mojave, with it's Joshua trees, the Colorado, with it's palm trees and mountain vistas. And warm, no, HOT sun and dry air. It was nirvana, and I needed a little reminder of that Eden to start my weekend.

So there I was, enjoying my soft tacos and daydreaming about the desert when I look down and there, on thin paper lining a plastic tray, was my key to a new career aspiration.

Whoever wrote the "Ode to the Bold" as part of Del Taco's "Go Bold or Go Home" campaign may have the best job ever.

Here's an excerpt.

"Here's to the pioneers. ... To the first to look a bull in the eyes and say, 'Yea, I'm gonna ride that. And with one hand.' Here's to the uninhibited. ... The lovers that honor one another with tattoos, The streakers. And the mooners. Here's to the brave. To those who can't karaoke, but karaoke anyway. ... Or objected at a wedding that needed an objection (thank you, thank you, thank you). Here's to the rule-breakers. ... And all the 4s out thee who married a 10. Here's to you, our customers. ... For you are the bold."

Made me feel like a stud for just eating a taco. I'm glad a went for the Del Scorcho sauce.

If you are going to go bold, you have to go all the way.

I kept the tray liner. I'm thinking of having it framed.

I wonder if the tray liner writer job comes with any pirques, like free combo burritos?

Hey, Dex, can you help me out?

My efforts to polish my culinary skills (OK, the develop ANY cooking skills) have been derailed, at least momentarily.

My grocery supply has run short, so I've reverted to some of my old ways the last few days. I've been eating out more often the last few days. I have no good excuse.

I may have rediscovered why I never developed the habit of regularly eating at home. Did you realized that in order to have food food in the house you have to go shopping? With each and every meal you prepare, your food supply is diminished. And if you don't use it fast enough, some of it spoils! What's up with that?

The fact of the matter is I've just been too lazy to go back to the store to stock up again. On the way home from work, I'm just not motivated to deal with tramping up and down the aisles, checkout counters, etc. So, then I get home, get busy being a bum, and then it just gets too late to go to the grocery store.

Maybe I need to start exploring the options to shop online and get my groceries delivered. Then I can sit on my ever-expanding butt at midnight in my underwear and artery-clogging digestibles.

***

I obviously spend too much time setting on my widening butt watching TV. So, since not everyone has that sort of quality time to bond with their boob tube, I'll share with you what I've learned.

There is this actor named Brian Stepanek who seems to be in every frickin' commercial there is. But don't take my word for it. Here are some samples:









For more samples of his work, check out the commercial reel on his website. The dude in omnipresent and funny as hell.

Have I ever mentioned that I did some acting in high school? Maybe I could have been the Dex guy! Naw, on second thought, probably not. If I was Dex, I'd already know how to find a grocery store that delivers after shopping online.

For some reason I'm craving a DiGiorno pizza and a DQ Blizzard.

Wanted: Cooking coach to help me heat things up

I stopped at the grocery store after work. There was more grocery shopping. I think I've bought groceries more this year than I have in the last several years combined. And I've certainly fixed more of my own meals that I have since, well, ever.

I'm got quite a little string going. But I've come to a a realization. Two actually.

The first is that I need more cookware. My one skillet and two pans aren't cutting it anymore when I'm making meals at home.

The second realization is that I need to learn how to cook. I need cooking lessons.

I finally figured out that the things I've been cooking in my skillet I've been preparing at too high a temperature. Perhaps my first clue should have been that the edges of my plastic spatulas were melting.

It's a little odd to realize that here I am, a single man in my early 40s, and I've lived alone pretty much all of my adult life, yet never really learned to cook. I even have a George Foreman grill and no idea how to use it.

Today at the grocery store I explored some parts of the store I tend not to venture into. If I can't use it to make a sandwich, boil it, microwave it, or eat it raw, it's not on my shopping list. Today I saw several thing that I was tempted to get, prepackaged items intended to be easy to prepare but realized I wasn't even brave enough -- yet -- to try new things. For example, I found this stir fry mix with seafood and veggies that looked great. But it looked like it was a family serving size and not something I could down in one meal. So I was stuck with a dilema. Do I only prepare part of it? And if I do, can I re-freeze it? Or do I prepare it all and then refrigerate the leftovers?

Simple questions. Basic questions. I just have no confidence at trying things in the kitchen.

My boldest adventure of late in the kitchen was making scrambled eggs. That's part of how I confirmed to myself that I've been cooking with the skillet too hot. My first batch was, well it was edible, but it looked like crap and made a mess. So, I actually looked up how to cook scrambled eggs. The proof was right there. Heat the pan on medium, cook on medium low.

Medium low? You can cook on medium low? I thought anything below high was just to keep the food warm until you were ready for seconds.

Who knew?

Obviously I need a cooking coach. No, I don't want to take a class. I want private lessons. Preferably with a hot, female cooking coach wearing not much more than an apron.

Oh, and you'll have to provide your own apron, I don't have one of those.

The end of the world as I've known it

The world absolutely must be coming to an end. You know how I can tell? I've been to grocery stores four times in a little over a week. To make it even more stunning, I actually bought groceries, for me -- my refrigerator, my cupboards.

As if that weren't a sure enough sign of the Apocalypse, I've actually been cooking. So between the meals I've cooked for myself, and the far superior home-cooked meals I had over the weekend (by far superior cooks, namely my daughter's mom and aunt), I've had home-fixed meals every day for more than a week.

What makes all that so stunning, is that I don't cook and rarely keep food in my house -- unless beer and chips and salsa qualify as food.

I'm hoping in the long run I end up spending less money on food that I normally would eating two or three meals a day from fastfood joints. There could potentially be some health benefits as well I supposed.

But there is downside to having food in the house. I find I eat when I'm bored. I eat when I'm hungry. I eat when I'm full. I eat way too much and too often.

So, I've got to figure out how to balance this whole having food in the house thing with not trying to each something of everything everyday until it's gone.

I've also got to get better at doing dishes, as I find I make meal selection choices based on what dishes are not sitting unwashed in the dishwasher (or sink) that I can prepare dishes in (or on).

Yea I know there are people who fix meals and do dishes everyday, I've just never been one of those people. My college roommate and I had the same affliction. How we ever had any dates, or allowed any women into our apartment is still a mystery. We didn't have a dishwasher, but had one of those double-sided sinks. We would get both sides of the sink filled, stacked a foot or two above the rim. We'd wait until every single glass, plate or piece of silverware in the house was used. And that might not have been so bad, but we would sometime run water over the dishes after using them (to keep the food from sticking). Of course running water in pots, pans and dishes in a sink filled with stuff dishes and food scraps would lead to mold forming after several days or weeks without actually doing the dishes.

It was pretty disgusting, especially during fruitfly season in late spring and summer in an apartment without air conditioning.

It's a wonder we didn't dye from some sort of mold-borne disease.

By comparison, I've come a long way in the years since, thanks mostly to having built-in dishwashers in most of the places I've lived in the years since. But I still suck at housework.

But hey, I have food to eat and have actually been using the burners on the stove to cook with on occasion, although the oven portion of the stove is still a virgin. Heck, the way things are going I may actually break out the George Foreman grill and buy things like mean and vegetables.

It's a scary world. Fortunately, the end must be near.