Thanks to a stranger of the giving kind

A woman I had never met, who's name I do not know, gave me an early holiday gift this evening. She demonstrated the spirit of generosity, sharing and selflessness that the holidays are supposed to be all about.

I don't want to be overly dramatic or make a bigger deal out of it than it deserves. We aren't talking about an organ donation here. But she game me something new to be thankful for and made me smile.

I went to the local Fred Meyer store to pick up a pie for tomorrow's family Thanksgiving feast. I was asked to bring a pumpkin pie, but I didn't know if one would be enough. I didn't want to take two of the same pies. You have to have a little variety and give people some options. Besides, I don't eat pumpkin pie. I'm not a big dessert eater ever and pies in general are not my favorite dessert. But on those occasions I do eat pie I mostly stick to apple pie and cheesecake. Cheesecake is my favorite, but when I think of Thanksgiving desert, I think of apple pie.

So when I walked in the grocery store this evening, I checked out the large display of pies at the front of the store. There were plenty of pumpkin pies and a few peach pies, and a bunch of other berry pies. But there was no sign of an apple pie.

While looking through the selection of baked goods, I noticed another woman who also seemed to be having trouble finding whatever it was she seeking. Pretty soon she walked away and I was left to examine the display more thoroughly. But soon I gave up and headed for the back of the store to the bakery section.

When I got there, I found another big display of pies, including pumpkin pie in two different sizes. So I grabbed a pumpkin pie and kept looking.

"Are you looking for apple?" a woman standing near the display asks. I recognized her as the woman I had seen a few minutes earlier at the other pie display.

"Kinda," I said. "I'm under orders to get pumpkin, but I like apple."

"There were only two left," she said. "Here, take this one. I already have one." And with that she places the pie she is holding back on the top of the display."

I tried to say no thank you, but she said she didn't need two and that I was welcome to it. "Take it," she said. She smiled and went on her way.

I smiled too. That simple act of sharing, that display of generosity, was a great way to start the holiday season. I have been looking forward to Thanksgiving because it will give me a chance to spend time with people I love. But now, thanks to a random act of kindness, I'm looking a little more forward to the holiday season in general. I had been worried about finances and not being able to buy as many or as expensive of gifts as I would like to buy for loved ones. But a stranger in a grocery story demonstrated what I already should have known --it's acts of caring and kindness that make this season special, not the price tag or label on a gift.

Is my work following me home or is my home following me to work?

The lines in my online life are getting blurred. I started a Facebook page for work, in order to create a page for my employer, and ended up finding a lot of friends. So I have a mixture of work colleagues and personal friends in my contacts.

I started a Twitter account, also for work, and tied it to my Facebook account, so my Twitter updates seem to amuse some of my friends because they update people on stories about farm animals and crop reports.

I like more tidiness in my life. More separation between my work life and personal life.

The irony is, once upon a time I used to tell people that what I do is who I am. I hope that's no longer the case. I hope that who I am is more complex and distinct that my merely stating my chosen vocation.

Sometimes work helps the personal life. Sometimes my personal interests inform my professional life. But I'm not sure how comfortable I am in having the lines of my online digital pursuits at home and work overlapping so much. Maybe it's just a sign of the new media environment, but it gets a little creepy.

Leave already, or I will

Dead Denny not only returned on Grey's Anatomy again this week, apparently dead people are amazing lovers. And even when Izzie spurned her ghostly lover, he still frickin' won't leave.

I may have to leave. The shark is in the process of being jumped. The concept was creative the first time I saw it, which Patrick Swayze's spirit used Whoopi Goldberg's body to ring Demi Moore's chimes. Now it's just tired.

We single men have enough pressure to deal with in trying to make women happy. Do we really need to compete with the screwed up notion of a love so true and powerful that a lover can come back from the dead to curl a woman's toes? What a stupid story line.

But I was recovering and feeling better when afterward I'm enjoying the show Life on Mars. I told myself that at least I have that to look forward to on Thursday nights, only to learn during the previews of the next new episode that the next new episode will not be on until Wednesday, Jan. 28. So, I get to wait two months and tune in a different night. Two months from now, I may have found something else to do with my time on Wednesday nights.

Network TV executives need to be shot. I'm more outraged by TV executives' decisions than people are about the big three from the Big Three automakers taking their private jets to Washington to beg Congress for a bailout. Those idiots make my credit card debt look like chump change.

But the morons running the networks -- canceling shows after only a few episodes, or only showing a few episodes of a show before taking an extended break --are going to wonder why their ad rates drop through the floor because no one is watching anymore.

Monday minutia

I broke down this evening and turned on the heat out in the living room for the first time this evening. I've turned on the heat a few nights back in the bedroom this season, and I've been turning on the space heater in the morning to heat up the bathroom for a while now. But I've been holding out on heating the main room But I'm tired of having to wrap up in a blanket and wear a sweatshirt just to watch TV or work on the computer.

I'm not looking forward to higher electric bills, but I HATE being cold.

***

I drove up to Portland last night in the fog. I got spoiled living in Southern California. I don't ever remember having fog there. I realized when I was driving home from Portland in the fog that If I have to drive in the fog I'd rather do it at night than during the day. You can see the taillights further up ahead at night than you can in the day. But still, driving in the ground mist is exhausting.

My eyes ached by the time I got home. By the time I went to bed I had a splitting headache. I'm not sure if driving in the fog contributed or not, but I'll blame it anyway.

***

I'm not pleased by all the Christmas displays and Christmas commercials on TV already. That stuff shouldn't start until after Thanksgiving. I swear the weeks from Thanksgiving to Christmas used to be plenty of a holiday season. My favorite radio station has even started playing the occasional Christmas song and promoting their website where you can get commercial-free Christmas music 24/7. I'm tempted to boycott the station until after the holidays.

But I know the real reason I hate the hard sell is I don't have money for many, if any, Christmas gifts this year. I don't need to be reminded of that every second of the day for the next 6 weeks. I had to by tires and still need an oil change and new brakes for the truck and new eyeglasses.

Merry Frickin' Christmas.

***

I took the plunge recently. I filled out a profile on an online dating site. I haven't used the site to contact anyone yet and the profile still needs work. But it's a first step. Right? That's progress. Right?

Has Grey's Anatomy jumped the shark?

I think Grey's Anatomy has jumped the shark. What's the deal with the ongoing Izzie and dead Denny storyline? Can't the writers find enough dramatic content in a hospital, complex family, friend and lover relationships? Do they have to keep bringing back a character they killed off? Really?

My opinion may not be universally held (see this post from Daytime Confidential). Hey, I can handle shows with supernatural storylines that are beyond the scope of normal, conventional beliefs. I like the show True Blood for example, with it's vampires and people who can hear people's thoughts or shape shifters, and Life On Mars and its time-traveling cop. But I want to know I'm expected to suspend disbelieve from the outset based on the plot.

I'm not saying I'm completely done watching Grey's Anatomy, but my loyalty to any network TV show is tenuous at best, given writers' strikes and odd-ball, on-again, off-again schedules, I can find something else to do with my time in any hour time slot -- like watching old Happy Days reruns.